When Others Try to Box You In

Well, as per usual, it's been a few months since my last update.  We've had a lot on our plates since June, mainly because we moved out, spruced up, and SOLD our house.  Yay!!!  I have never seen such a large number in my bank account.  It would be more awesome if I didn't know it's going to be dropping as soon as possible to it's former miniscule self when we buy a new house.

So what, are we homeless?!?!  No, we're lucky enough to have both my and DaddyO's parents here in town and, because I am allergic to the sweet doggies my in-laws own, we are currently living in my parents' house.  Along with my parents.  And my uncle.  So if you're playing along at home, that means there are EIGHT people living in this house right now.  Cue disaster music.

Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful that we don't have to shell out rent while we're house-hunting, and I'm grateful that my children get this time with their grandparents and great-uncle.  Truly.  But whereas before our lifestyle choices and radical unschooling were just something weird that we crazy kids were doing, it's now *right there*, in the grandparents' faces, just begging to be critiqued, apparently.

So what do you do when someone you love tells you you're raising your children wrong?  What do you do when someone with NO knowledge of educational theory or even brain development tells you that you're damaging your children by focusing on your relationships and character rather than academics?  And not just damaging them, but actually setting them up for a life of illiteracy, ignorance, and flat-out failure!  And never mind that our little family is happier together, more respectful, and has less yelling and anger than mine ever had growing up.  Apparently THAT counts for nothing.  So what do you do to shore yourself up and keep going?

Well, if you're me, you read a book.  Or two.  Or six.

Because, dangit, I KNOW this is right.  I know that we are making the right choice for OUR children based on their needs and personalities and our definition of success (which, by the way, has little to do with money and more to do with healthy relationships, confidence, and determination to succeed at THEIR goals).  But sometimes, when someone I love tells me I'm doing things wrong, it takes the wind out of my sails.  It gives me pause and sends me back to the ol' drawing board to reevaluate and make sure I'm doing things right.  And you know what?

I am.

Among the books I've read in the past two months are: Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen, The Big Book of Unschooling by Sandra Dodd (again), Radical Unschooling: A Revolution has Begun by Dayna Martin, How Children Succeed by Paul Tough, and a really good book on how to set your boundaries so you can say "none ya bizness!" when people get nosy in a critical way. :-)  Because while I LOVE to talk about Unschooling and consensual living and how to grow strong family relationships, I realize that I do NOT have to put up with people who want nothing more than to tell me that I'm living my life incorrectly according to their expectations.

I beat the crap out of that box. :-)